Monday, 12 September 2016

Kindness In Sadness

It was my fault.... i caused The Great Hexham Blackout, all twelve hours of it.  well, my garden did.... or if you want to be pedantic, the mains cable that runs through the garden of my flat, via the road leading to my cul-de-sac did.  and the evidence is captured above for all to see.... behold my ex-garden, in which is buried my ex-cat.

The universe decided a Bank Holiday Monday was a good day to wake jeni to a world without power, a trench where once grass, shrubs and all things green grew in abundance and a moggie meeting it's Maker.   losses that could be classed as minimal in a world where nation is at war with nation, natural disaster flattens entire towns and multitudes are sick and dying of preventable diseases.   minimal to many, but not to the individual at  the centre of the maelstrom.  it was a day when my commitment to positivity was tested and almost found to be inadequate.... almost.   
There is a misconception commonly held about optimistic people that they are emotionless or out of touch with their deeper selves, that they simply don't "feel" as much as other people.   of course, i can only speak for myself but.... NOT TRUE !!!   ask those who saw the tears dripping off my chin if this  putative positive person showed cold eyed, sociopathy  when Mr Cat joined the Mouse Master In The Sky, was reincarnated as a sabre tooth or simply added nutrients to the soil depending on your philosophy.   it's not that we have lives without heartache, it's  that we work hard to find some glimmer of hope in the midst of darkness to help offset the pain.

On that Monday morning the catharsis came in the shape of The Great British Workman.   when their mini digger came trundling round the bend the solution to the conundrum of where to put little Mister Cat was solved.  they dug a cat sized hole, gently took him from my arms, tucked his favourite blanket round him and lay him down to rest.   these big, tough, burly men all downed tools and stood silently at the barrier as the soil was, oh so gently, nudged back into place.   a child pulled from the rubble of an earthquake shattered village couldn't have been afforded more dignity.   they then found a large, round, leaf embossed slab and placed it on top of him to mark the spot.  

It will take a couple of years for my garden to return to it's lush, jungle like previous incarnation and i will miss the private little oasis it had become.  it will take much longer for the Mister Cat shaped hole in my heart to fill despite fostering homeless furries.  but when i look back on that cheerless Monday i have a choice of what to focus on and speak about.   i can allow the losses to take precedence and drag me down by the roots, into the depths or i can remember the kindness of those big men shown to a stranger, smile and be thankful.     


Ruth said...

So they didn't take any notice of the drift wood kerb we'd put round the edge of the garden?! Their thoughtfulness amidst getting on with their job is very heart-warming.

Anonymous said...

Wow, just wow. What has been going on? Have I read right that by burying mister you cut through cables or is you assuming that it's all your fault? Oh dear in whichever way it was. However you get to design your garden again. It can be rebuilt and be beautiful again.
The workmen were lovely to help with mister ☺ love you...sending hugs from me.
Sue xxx

brokenbutstillstanding62 said...

thanks for hugs. no idea what caused the cable to fail. old age like the cat perhaps.

brokenbutstillstanding62 said...

drift wood back in place with a few additions they brought with them. any smallish interesting pieces to fill gaps between baby replacement plants would be very appreciated