Mother
Teresa said "loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted
is the most terrible poverty"
I'm
sure those who are truly poverty stricken and destitute would
disagree with the sentiment, i mean..... you can't eat your friends
can you? But there is a truth in there that is worth a second
look, as i've always
believed that without my family and my friends i would be greatly
diminished. It's in their love and esteem that my
universe has value and in the love and esteem i offer them i,
hopefully, become a better human.
Loneliness
has been described as a 21st century plague with the irony being that
social media means we can talk 24/7 without ever seeing or touching
another person. now, i love my phone and the internet
is my window on the world but an hour texting
or emailing lacks the warmth and empathy of an hour sharing a cuppa
with a friend, along with their laughter or tears or memories.
social media can't greet with a hug or pass a tissue to wipe reddened
eyes, it can't linger on the sofa over a shared photo or slip
an arm round slumped shoulders.
The
elderly face a great cost in losing social contact.
my mother used to say how hard it was to count the missing cards at
Christmas as her contemporaries, one by one, succumbed to illness and
frailty. we tend to make friendships within our own generation
so as we reach old age our friends and siblings are facing their own
declining health. we all gain from communities of mixed ages as
well as mixed ability. the old have company and can benefit
from being challenged to stay young in mind and heart if not in
body, and the young, if they are willing to listen, can learn
about a life so different from theirs it might as well be a foreign
land.
How
do the disabled make new friends and keep old ones? it's not
easy, believe me! finding the energy is just the beginning of
what can feel like a major trek on the path to sociability.
it can feel oh so easy to dive under the duvet when offered a "drive
out to do something" !!! pain and fatigue can
make us seem aloof and absent, or we do the old "boom and bust"
dance of being full of life and fun around people then crashing for
several days afterwards, closing the curtains to lick the wounds of
kindness. We long for your company and feel bereft
without it, at the same time we feel failures at friendship when we
have to spoil the party by going home early to nurse our hurt and
exhaustion.
We
need your help in this balancing, budgeting act. be
patient with us as we fumble our way through this alien land that is
disability. tell us you don't mind journeying across town
for a half hour visit. that, of course you'll drop us at
a destination then go park the car, even if it is tipping down with
rain. bring your friends if you think we'll connect so we
have a chance to meet new people. pretend to be interested
even though we have so little to talk about as we see so little of
the world. above all........bring cake as it sweetens every
relationship.
3 comments:
Couldn't agree more 😄 x
Well written young lady but the problem is a hard one to solve in this busy lifestyle the people have put upon us....needs amending ;-) sue x
thank you for your understanding. no judgment is intended, i'm sure you know that. knowing friends are there taking time to read my ramblings is a real blessing that fills a void. xxx
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